When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
I haven't shared this with anyone really and need (desperately) to get it off my chest. Jason's been sick for a long time. He's been to the doctor repeatedly and they found nothing wrong. He had x-rays and blood work and nothing. He's not sleeping well and he can't breath. All tests came back normal and then FINALLY 2 weeks ago a last resort blood test found something. He had a toxic Streptococcus Syndrome and it required immediate action...or so the voice recording said on a Friday night. I was more than a little frustrated. He'd been going to the doctor since February and they just found it. He's now on his 3rd week of treatments and very slowly getting better. I'm so worried and frustrated and just trying to keep my family afloat. Luckily, finals are over. I was a wreck during finals with my sick husband pretending he's not sick and my kids still needing food and all. Tonight I just watched Jason tossing and turning in pain for about 2 hours before finally going to bed and I'm fairly certain these shots aren't cutting it. I don't know what we need or what can help, I just needed to get it off my chest. I'm terrified of this.